Understand Perception, Understand Employee Reaction

It must be 15 years ago when Mum was walking along the cliff top at the seaside, she slipped and was in danger of falling down the cliff...Dad - amazingly as reactions were not his greatest asset! - grabbed her hand and saved her, possibly from a fatal fall. Was Dad the hero ?
Not quite.
Mum was in agony as her hand was broken!

My life lesson was this....it is not what you do, it is not how great your intention is...it is how the person feels AFTER your action.

Mum could only see her broken hand, she could only feel the pain...it was only later, much later that she understand the wiser implications of what had just happened. Dad didn't react to Mum's anger, he let her be mad...then when she returned home with her cast....turned and said "It's our turn to look after you, now (He dealt with her fear). A broken hand is better than a family of broken hearts of a mother/wife lost (He put it into context)"

Leadership can be like that.....your best intentions can be seen as wrong, can be perceived as harmful in the short term. Dad's reaction showed me that you need to allow your actions to sink in, understand why they have reacted that way, then guide them through to seeing the larger picture.